I’ve had a lot of relationships in my life – family, friends, co-workers, the occasional romantic entanglement (pre-husband and child, of course). But none have taught me more about unconditional love than the dogs in my life. Because if there’s one thing dogs understand better than humans, it’s how to love without hesitation, conditions, or the expectation of a return on investment (unless cheese is involved – because the cheese tax must always be paid).
I’ve been lucky to share my life with some incredible dogs. When I was a child, our family dog, Mitzi taught me my first lesson in loyalty, trust and companionship. Then, my husband and I had Toby, a beagle-spaniel cross, who was with us for 15 years. He taught us how important a “pack” is – if we left him home alone, he would howl so mournfully that it was impossible not to feel the weight of his loneliness. And now, there’s Luna, our greyhound cross, who is seven years old, tough, smart and just a little bit psycho.
Unconditional love is in the little things
Luna doesn’t need grand gestures to feel loved. She doesn’t care about expensive gifts or elaborate displays of affection. To her, unconditional love is found in the quiet moments – me scratching behind her ears while I read, the simple joy of a morning walk, or the way I instinctively reach down to ruffle her fur as I pass by.
Maybe we overcomplicate love. Maybe it isn’t about the big, dramatic moments we see in movies. Maybe it’s just about showing up, day after day, and being present for the people (and fur-people) who matter.
Unconditional love means instant forgiveness
I have, on more than one occasion, stepped on Luna’s paw. Each time, she lets out a yelp, looks up at me with those big, betrayed eyes … and then, five seconds later, she’s back to happily trotting alongside me. No grudge. No passive-aggressive sighing. Just instant forgiveness.
Humans, on the other hand? We hold onto things. We stew in resentment. We replay conversations in our heads, assigning meaning to things that probably weren’t intended. But what if we let go of small hurts as easily as dogs do? What if we forgave, not because someone deserved it, but because love is more important than keeping score?
Love is never wasted
Luna greets everyone as if they are a long-lost friend. The neighbour, the postie, random strangers – each person is met with the same unfiltered enthusiasm.
She doesn’t hesitate, wondering if they’ll love her back. She just loves, fully and without reservation. And even if someone isn’t interested in her affection, she simply moves on, tail wagging, ready to try again with the next person. No heartbreak, no fear of rejection. Just love, given freely.
How often do we hold back love because we’re afraid it won’t be returned? What if, instead of guarding ourselves so fiercely, we gave without expectation, trusting that love – whether it’s returned or not – is never wasted?
Trust first, worry later
Luna’s default setting is trust. She assumes the best in everyone until proven otherwise. She greets new people with curiosity, not caution.
And sure, humans are a bit more complicated than dogs. We’ve all been burned before. But what if we started with trust instead of skepticism? What if we approached people with the belief that they are good, rather than assuming we need to protect ourselves? Maybe, just maybe, we’d be pleasantly surprised.
Unconditional love is without ego
Luna loves to play, but she doesn’t play mind games. She does not hold back affection to make me “work for it.” She doesn’t wait for me to text first (though, if she had thumbs, I suspect she’d send a lot of messages demanding snacks). When she loves, she loves fully.
Humans? We complicate things. We hesitate. We worry about looking “too eager.” We overanalyse responses and carefully calculate how much affection to give, lest we seem too invested.
But unconditional love – real love – is not about power or control. It’s about vulnerability. Dogs get that. Maybe we should too.
Maybe dogs have it right
At the end of the day, Luna doesn’t care if I’ve had a bad day, if I’m in a mood, or if I look a mess. She loves me anyway.
And isn’t that what we all want? To be loved, even when we’re not at our best? To be accepted without conditions, without performance, without having to earn it?
Maybe dogs have it right. Maybe love isn’t as complicated as we make it. Maybe, if we paid attention, we’d learn that unconditional love isn’t about perfection – it’s about presence.
And cheese.
Em x
